There are no Ken dolls in this picture

 

I have been watching the freak out over the Barbie movie by a wingnut (my noun for a collection) of right wing male nut jobs with some amusement and a little concern. People, these guys are not ok! The most stunning thing about their fits, is that I now know that these types had absolutely no idea, prior to July 2023, of just how marginal Ken is to the entire Barbie play experience.

I grew up in the 70s, at the height of Barbiemania, with a mother who loved pretty things. My mother was essentially Mattel's dream Barbie consumer. She adored fashion and OUTFITS, and shopping, even if it was just for teeny little versions. She loved Barbie at least as much as I did. I probably had twenty different Barbies, (along with her family and friends, Skipper, Midge, Malibu PJ, etc….). My collection was the envy of the neighborhood. I had both the Barbie van and the Barbie convertible. I had the Dream House and the condo. I even had the add on Barbie pool for the Dream House. The Barbies spent a lot of time at the pool. I had well over one hundred outfits for the various dolls. Most of our play centered around changing Barbies into new outfits and restyling those to combine different sets. Topping PJ's bathing suit and blue miniskirt combo with the pink robe with marabou trim for a pool party brought about much heated debate.

All this to say, I was a heavy Barbie user. Yet I can’t remember if I even had a Ken doll in my collection. If I did, it was just the one. Ken was irrelevant, his clothes were boring. He was less important as an accessory than his surfboard, for sure. If there was a disco dance in the offing, I could always grab my brother's GI Joes to be dance partners. The GI Joes didn't live in Barbie's world - they were just occasionally allowed to visit. Just like Ken dolls, they were peripheral to the plot.

Full disclosure, I haven't seen the movie yet. I am looking forward to going next weekend. But from the crazy antic from some of its critics, I've got a bit of an idea of what it's about. I've never really considered before how (some) men might react if there was ever a movie that they weren't central to. A movie existing in a world where they were a minor accessory. I guess I know now, and I'm watching them demonstrate (loudly, and sometimes with fire) that they really need to get some help and some perspective. Back when I was a playing with Barbies, that kind of temper tantrum would have gotten the dolls taken away for a good long while, until I could behave myself. Maybe those guys need a time out and a nap.

P.S. I'd be remiss not to mention that my book is now available in paperback as well as by download. There are no Barbies in it, but there are some fun outfits and it is a great summertime read! Locals, come on by for an autographed copy. 

(please buy my book by clicking on the link below, and thank you!)  

Two Truths and a Lie

How characters come to exist (for me anyway)

    Since my novel, Two Truths and a Lie (available now on the free Kindle app from Amazon (you don't need a Kindle, just the app) com'on, you know I had to plug it!!!!) came out, a number of people have asked me how close the characters and settings are to real people and how much is fiction - my best answer is that the novel is a work of fiction, and also that the first advice every writer is given is "write what you know." So I write about short women, because I have no idea how tall men navigate their worlds, and this novel takes place largely in the NY suburbs and in a New England prep school in the 80s because those are the places I know best. However, once the writing starts, the whole story - places, and characters take on a life of their own. 

    (I could show you some cringe-worthy teen writing that completely disregards the "write what you know" advice and takes place in a NYC the writer longs to live in, but hasn't yet even visited. But I won't, 😁 because it is baaaaaaaaaaaaad! Spoiler alert, the subway doesn't seem to exist in that NYC.)

    Instead, let me tell you how the character of Willie Hooks in my novel (did I mention it was available on the free Amazon Kindle app????) came about. He came into existence because of a cool denim jacket I once saw some guy wearing. I don't know the person who wore it, I can't quite remember where or when, I saw it - it isn't even exactly the same jacket that is described in the novel, but the image of this super cool denim jacket, and wondering who might have bought it, and why, got stuck in my head. When I started to write about a boy Kat took for granted at Mansfield, that jacket reshaped itself and its story until it became Willie.

    So to answer those writing questions, yes, some of the stuff in my novel is real - sort of, kind of, but really, truly, actually, not real at all. There is usually a tiny nugget of reality that gets swirled around into a vat of "what if this happened" and then a lot of  "oooh, or how about that!" and some, "no that's not quite right" and poked and prodded and massaged for how ever long it takes to becomes a fully baked 80,000 word novel. Or at least that's how happens for me. Your milage may vary.

    I've heard of writers who meticulously plan out the entire arcs of their books...but that isn't my style - I daydream stories and make up people to go in them, hanging them all on the tiniest of frameworks until they tell me they are set and their story is ready to be told. One time I found a treasure trove of stories at a yard sale - twelve, tiny, engraved, silver baby spoons - and made up a life for each each of the names and a family tree and home life that encompasses them all. (You have to wait for the next book for those stories.) 

    I'd love to hear what you think about Two Truths and a Lie. Please read it, so we can talk about these characters and their stories. See if you can figure our which parts are the truths and which parts are the lies. 

Until next time,

-S

Buy my book!

 So this happened.....

and I could tell you that's why it's been awhile since I've written here, and it's part of it - but also in large part because I haven't felt like I had much to say that was interesting enough to other people during the COVID years. But now I do! You can buy my book! 

Available on the Amazon kindle app (you don't need a Kindle, you can get the app on any computer, tablet or phone) and coming soon (I hope!!) in paperback!  https://www.amazon.com/Two-Truths-Lie-Suki-Dijk-ebook/dp/B0BGT1X4M4/ref=sr_1_1?crid=2I9FWECEG47H9&keywords=two+truths+and+a+lie+suki+van+dijk&qid=1666893203&qu=eyJxc2MiOiIwLjAwIiwicXNhIjoiMC4wMCIsInFzcCI6IjAuMDAifQ%3D%3D&s=books&sprefix=two+truths+and+a+lie+suki+van+dijk%2Cstripbooks%2C81&sr=1-1

So buy my book (please!) and if you like it leave a review (please!) come back to my blog tomorrow for a look into how the writing process works (for me anyway!)

thank you!

Promise of spring

Spring this year seems to have an extra level of spring to it.  

Of course there is the usual joy of having made through another cold dark winter.  I am always thrilled by this time of year, seeing the colors of our forsythia, daffodils, and tulips, greet my mornings, instead of winter's icy grey.  Yet this year even more so - with vaccinations allowing our lives to begin to return to some semblance of normalcy, it feels even larger than the usual spring joy. It holds more import than previous springs. It feels weighty enough to warrant a fifth question at the Seder table, 

"Why is this spring different from all others?"

"We have a vaccine!"

My family will be fully vaccinated by the end of April. I was so relieved when I was able to finally book our youngest's appointment that I actually cried. Soon we will all be able to be together again. We'll hug friends. We'll wear lipstick. We'll leave our cocoons and be part of the world again.

I wish us all the promise that this spring holds.

NOT MY COVID STORY

This is not my story, this is my friend's story, I won't use her name, or include too many. details, because, well, it's not my story. I tried to write short version for Rye Moms, but it was rejected as "not right for the page." I'll leave you to your own conclusions about that.

My friend is a nurse. She went back to school to get her nursing degree in her late 40s after she beat cancer. That the kind of person she is. I hadn't seen her in over 20 years, and when she found out I was all alone, cleaning out my parents' house after my dad died, she dropped everything and came over to sit with me. That's the kind of person she is. She and her husband were high school sweethearts. That's the kind of person she is.

As I type this, she is in a rehab center, relearning to move her body after nearly two months on a ventilator. She can't go home until she can take care of herself. A day after she was released to the rehab center, her twenty-something aged girls had to tell her that their dad, her husband of 30 years, couldn't visit, because he died shortly after she succumbed to this vicious bug and went onto the ventilator. The last thing she remembers is sitting by his hospital room, holding up a card she brought him for their anniversary. That was late-May.

The summer is nearly gone, and our COVID cases are now few. I hear people saying it's gone, we can socialize again safely, and I see how they look at me when I refuse. I know many people think wearing a mask outside is unnecessary, but I'm wearing it anyplace people might get near me. Because the heart of what I do as a Mom is to protect my family. So my questions are, what would you do to keep your kids from having to break that news to you?  What would you do to save them the pain of 2 months of not knowing if tomorrow was the day they might become orphans? What would you do to keep your family safe?

Keep wearing masks, even when your friends roll their eyes. Keep six feet away from people not in your household. Stay out of crowded spaces. Limit your time indoors with others to only necessary trips. Eventually we will have a vaccine or a cure, but until then, stay safe.

Happy 4th?

This picture is from 3 years ago. THREE!!!!!! This is what the 4th of July used to look like. This year there will be no pool, no BBQs, no fireworks, no friends. Because the administration that is in charge of our federal government thought it could gaslight a virus.

This chart shows the result.

I have had a very privileged life. I've spent every 4th of July I can remember at the beach with friends and family. I love this country and everything it actually stands for.  So the 4th has always been one of my favorite holidays. But I have never seen a 4th of July like this. Because you can't actually gaslight a virus. The virus doesn't care about your politics. The virus only wants a host. Our TV game show host delivered it millions.

The virus is new, so we are a long way from knowing all about it, but we do have some information about strategies for stopping transmission. Wash your hands. Wear a mask. Limit social interactions as much as you can. Outside is safer than inside. Shorter interactions (under 15 minutes) are safer than longer ones. You protect me with your behavior and I protect you with mine. Be safe. I hope by next year we can truly celebrate the 4th of July, and be together again.

Mid-March-Mid May 2020

If a picture is worth 1,000 words...